How to Disagree Agreeably with Your Clients

Who doesn’t hate getting caught in disagreements – the fights, the bitterness and the whole drama? Yet, who doesn’t disagree? Everyone has their views, and even the kings are questioned.

Talking of kings, they say that clients need to be treated as royalty. That may be true. But as a consultant or a vendor, you are an expert at what you do. It is up to you to raise a red flag where it is due. And although what you say has to be said, there is a disclaimer – you should pay attention to the manner in which you say it.

Consider the following scenario. You have created a solution for a difficult client problem that you are very proud of. You email it to the client expecting instant approval. Within a few minutes you receive a call from them. Thinking it is to applaud your effort, you pick the call up, but you are disappointed. The client is not happy with the solution and he recites a huge list of changes. On listening you feel as though the client has got it all wrong and not understood or even read your solution thoroughly. Without letting him complete the list, you jump right in with your views and a lecture on your decade-long experience in matter. Blah, blah, blah…

Result. The client bangs the phone down and you are left with a bigger problem in hand.

So, what went wrong?

Effective communication is the key and here is a list of tips that may help you in handling similar or more complex scenarios better.

1. Listen patiently

Listening to the client’s argument without prejudices and staying away from stating your points before you hear their whole story is a good way to begin. Many a time, in anticipation of a disagreement, people turn defensive too quickly only to realise later that they were actually on the same page!

2. Pick your point

After hearing to the argument, taking a minute or two to pick your side and building a point is wise. Rushing too quickly with your argument may get your thoughts all tangled and messy.

3. Get your emotions on check

The tone of communication is as important as the content being communicated. Your psyche and your emotions have a definite implication on your tone. Regaining your composure before putting forth your point sends a positive signal to the client.

4. Be respectful

After listening to a harsh argument ensuring that your response, attitude and manners reflect respect and courtesy befitting a king is a tough task and calls for immense self-control. Nevertheless, it is crucial and will have a calming effect on the client.

5. Embrace diplomacy

Diplomacy is not an inherent value, but a skill that needs fostering. Knowing how to put forth a differing thought without making it sound conflicting needs practice and is essential. For instance, by beginning your response with simple phrases like “That’s an interesting perspective” or “I know why you are saying that” can set off a very promising tempo.

6. Keep it factual

Instead of keeping the conversation personal, throwing in a lot of facts and making your point more credible avoids instigation and encourages the client to see your point.

7. Talk to win-win

The difference between argument and a constructive discussion is that in the former, your aim is to get your way in the end. And in the latter, you aim is to clear the air, have a fair exchange of thoughts and mutually find a way that is beneficial for both. The latter is the way to go.

8. Care to compromise

Your point may be different from that of the client, but not necessarily better. Shedding your ego and being willing to give in for the common good is a trait of humility and greatness. And it is an attitude that will be most certainly noted and appreciated by even the toughest of clients.

Now keeping these tips in mind, how could the earlier scenario have been handled better?

• By staying calm, listening to the whole list of changes and beginning with an apology.

• By assessing the client’s feedback and accepting to makes changes that are fair.

• On areas where you still feel you are right, by handling it diplomatically and presenting it to the client in a more conducive way.

This way, not only would you have managed your client well but more importantly, you would have come up with a solution that embodies the positives from your perspective as well as from that of the client. You would have successfully managed a potential havoc and turned it into a win-win.

Now, these eight tips help best with impromptu arguments that spur off without an alarm, as is the case of the above scenario. On the other hand, when invited for a scheduled challenging discussion such as with a tough client and an even tougher agenda, you could consider going more prepared. For instance, in the same scenario above if the client had scheduled a meeting to brief you on the list of changes instead of telling them over the phone, in addition to the eight tips it is useful to keep the following in mind.

• Researching and collating thoughts to create a structure as to what to talk to the client can be helpful.

• Knowing your audience and streamlining your approach and structuring how to present your thoughts in order to suit the clients’ approach/personalities is equally important.

• Rehearsing is not juvenile. In the case of very delicate or sensitive discussions, doing a role play is a good thing. This will help you see the probable reactions to the points you are to put forth and help you plan your replies accordingly.

True to the song from Mary Poppins, a spoon full of sugar does make the medicine go down in the most delightful way. By taking simple care in communicating right, even the toughest of client issues can be whisked away with ease.